Debi Johnson Coaching

“I don’t want to get to the end of my life and find that I lived just the length of it. I want to have lived the width of it as well.” – Diane Ackerman

I love this quote.  It truly is my intention.  I have the quote posted in my home and on my website.   

Am I living the width of my life?  I have plans to.  I want to.  I have such grand ideas, such amazing dreams.  

I need ACTION.  I feel like I have been sitting on the sidelines of my life waiting for the excitement to begin; waiting for a heavenly push of sorts. 

2010 began with me as a student in the Martha Beck life training course.  It was such a beautiful ride.  I met amazing like-minded women, traveled, discovered more about myself, and learned how I can help others.  I gained valuable insight and tools that I can use to help others find their own best lives.  The course ended and it’s time for me to begin my coaching career.   

I want 2011 to be a year of jumping into the wide pool of my life!  There is so much that I want to do; that I can do.  I just need to take a step, than another and another until I am living my heart’s desire.  Am I afraid, heck yeah, but it’s that exhilarating, exciting fear.  It’s going after my purpose. 

As Marianne Williamson says, “Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us”. 

Perhaps I am afraid of my own light and I need to relax and let it shine.  I believe my purpose in life is to help others discover their amazing adventures and find their own lights.

I am setting the intention that a year from today I’ll look back and see that I stretched myself in ways that I didn’t believe possible; that I followed my heart toward compassion and love.  

In being TAO (transparent, authentic and open), I am new to coaching, but I love what I do.  I believe that I have a good insight into people.  I love my life.  I am blessed.  I know that my life is an adventure.  I’m ready to jump into the wide open pool and swim!

How about you?  Are there ways that you could lean into the width of your own life?  What’s the first step that you can take?  Let’s go!

As I was driving home from work tonight, I turned on the radio to hear,”Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer”.  What a happy Christmasy song!  I wanted to sing along with it, but I just wasn’t feeling it.  I wasn’t feeling much of anything, but stress.  I know, that’s no way to be.  I should be in the holiday spirit, right?  It’s the middle of December and I should be excited and ready for fun.  

I feel like I’m on a Holiday Roller Coaster!  I’d better fasten my seat belt and hold on for dear life because this ride is taking me through Christmas happenings at lightening speed.  I am sitting in the back-to-back cars with other frantic  holiday passengers.  Aren’t roller coasters, like Christmas, supposed to be fun?  Who am I,  Scrooge? No I’m a busy woman and Christmas is adding to my busy load.  It’s busyness all wrapped up in green and red bell ringing fun, but I feel too overwhelmed to enjoy it.    I feel guilty even writing about this.  My brain says “Cheer up, it’s the holidays!”  It’s just that it can feel like torture if you really don’t feel much like going with the flow.  No matter what your religion of choice may be, the whirlwind of the craziness is bound to have an effect on you.  I don’t think I’m alone in feeling this.

I seem to have a loop of endless thoughts going through my head saying: 
    December 15th DEADLINE to mail packages! 
    Remember - send Christmas cards. 
    Make cookies like mom used to make. 
    Lose 10 pounds before the Christmas party.
    And the big one ~ How am I going to pay for all of this? 
    On and on and on…

I say it’s time to get off of the bumpy ride.  It’s time to say, ENOUGH, STOP, UNCLE, I GIVE!  

Imagine….silence.  Stop.  Listen.  Breathe.  Ask yourself, “What do I want, what do I need?  How do I want this season to go”?   We actually have a choice. In remembering my Christmas times of yesterday blending in with now, I guess I can get melancholy.  This time of year brings up a lot of memories, thoughts of missed loved ones and how fast things are changing. 

 I decided to change things up,  get off of the roller coaster and follow what my heart is telling me:  

• I’m going to allow myself to feel my emotions.  As I sat under my Christmas tree last night thinking about my mom that has passed away, I gave myself space to remember her and cry.  I needed that.  I realize if I don’t notice my feelings they still hang out showing up in other ways like overeating or overspending. 
• Remember that there is no perfect Christmas and there is no way that I can make it that way for anyone else.  Somehow I tend to want to buy, decorate and bake my way into giving my loved ones a perfect Christmas. The best gift that I can give is to just BE ME, my imperfect, emotional loving self.  I want to be remembered as someone that is kind, loving and honest instead of how much I was always running around trying to make things perfect.
• I give myself permission to give up my “have to make perfect Christmas cookies and fudge” thinking.  I can easily go to the store and buy a Pillsbury package and just put them in the oven.  What the heck, I don’t even HAVE TO make cookies at all!  
• I can say ’NO’.  If asked to do something that I truly don’t have the time or energy to do.  No is an okay word.
• I am going to take care of ME by finding more ME TIME.  Maybe a pedi, a long bath or guiltlessly reading PEOPLE.   I might even splurge on a Peppermint mocha and actually sit in the coffee shop and savor it.   

We do have a choice.  We don’t have to ride the crazy roller coaster this holiday season, but glide through it at our own pace.  What’s the worst that can happen if we don’t?   Will the world fall off of its axis?  I don’t think we have THAT much power!

Right now I’m in no hurry.  My Christmas list will have to just wait.  I’m sitting under the Christmas tree with my giggling grandson watching him rearrange the ornaments so that the bottom of my Christmas tree is beautiful.

How about you?  What ways are you jumping off of the holiday roller coaster to find your joyful, relaxed place?